Welcome to the F.C. Phoenix Website


    ......................................................................................................................................................................
      Click here to get 20% off Kitbag products with Sportstation
     
    ......................................................................................................................................................................
    How will FC Phoenix cope in Division 3
    Champions
    Runners Up
    Mid Table
    Bottom
    League and Cup double


    Latest Club News
    08 Jun, 2008
    Toby To See Specialist

    Reports in a local newspaper suggest that Toby Berry is off to America to see a specialist.
    The Midfield hardman missed the last game of the season because of stress but since going on holiday to Thailand for a month, he has deteriated and is said to be unstable.
    He has turned to drink and gambling to help his problems but has only been getting worse. He was snapped by a papperazzi cross dressing in Thailand, and talking to a fruit machine.
    Manager Osgood is extremely worried about his player and has sent him to America to see a Mental Specialist.
    A worker at the Hospital had this to say
    "Toby is in very good hands, he will hopefully make a full recovery within a month."
    Toby will be staying there the same time as Paul Gascoigne who has a similar condition.
    We will bring you an update of Toby's condition over the next few weeks.


    07 Jun, 2008
    More Stories on Celebrity Z-lister

    Doctors have no answer after Murdy bleeds Big in Barca. Whilst on a weekend away to Barca, Murdy awoke to see blood spilling out of his temple(for the people that care he can still see).

    The bed was covered in the greenish red substance also seen in the toilet sink in Kavos, which was apparently said to be sick but sources say that was a cover up story(picture shown with this story).

    This isn't the first incident that involves the bed. In Bournemouth Marcus awoke to find poo in the bed delivered fresh by Murdy that night. In Plymouth he was choking on his own sick whilst hugging a McDonalds takeaway bag, only to be saved by Toby. In New York he awoke with a dislocated shoulder and a male prostitute next to him.

    Finally whilst on a camping trip to Steyning with Gary Dixon and Mark Grey, Murdy awoke to find shards of glass in his skull and removed pubic hair. This was a cause for concern.

    In a statement made by the player he said - 'Im devastated to have lost the hair down below but at least my number 7 is still firmly on my chest, you know what i mean. Im working closely with doctors on my private problems and we hope to find a solution soon'.

    Rumours are sparking of the relationship between Doctor and patient also Murdy has recently stated that he will be auditioning to appear on Celebrity Big Brother. The bench boy is looking to kick start his career - possibly in the toilet cleaning business.

    Cheer up Murdy, the fans are with you bud!

     


    31 May, 2008
    End of Season Update
    With the season well and truly over now, the Phoenix players look to be enjoying their summer break. Most players are off to relax and enjoy the european sun, but not for Stuart Evans.
    He will be looking to overcome his phobia of lights.
    Stuart was diagnosed with terminal epilepsy a week after he lost his license for dangerous driving.
    He will be travelling to Las Vegas to be bridesmaid at a wedding.
    Worried friend Toby Berry is also making the trip, as he has been told by manager Osgood to keep Stuart away from the casinos and bars. The troubled fringe player almost lost everything a couple of seasons ago, after he bet 3Million on scoring 2 goals in one season.
    If the 'Striker' gets into anymore bother, then the board will reconsider his position as a player/ Social Secretary (Mincing Enforcer).
    17 May, 2008
    Phoenix Open New Facilities
    Chairman Adam has today opened a brand new medical complex for the club.
    This will contain all of the latest equipment needed for the players such as an ice bath and a oxygen tent.
    Adam released a statement saying,
    "This is a huge step forward for the club, this new complex contains everything the players need to maintain there fitness over the coming season. This will be a massive advantage for us over the rest of the teams, and should see us having a good season again"
    There have also been reports in a local Tabloid that Phoenix are also going to be getting a new training complex and a new stadium, but Adam would not comment on this.

    19 Apr, 2008
    Awards

    Chairmans Player - Dan Wells

    Managers Player - Ashley Picton

    Most Improved - Jackie Kool

    Players Player - Ashley Picton

    Top Goal Scorer - Shane Birch (49)

    The Ken Reynolds Trophy - Debbie